LOCKING IN - a 20-minute prose exercise

Here’s my 20-minute prose exercise for today. If you’d like to share yours, you can email me here. I’m working on getting a place to share them publicly (anonymously) on here if that’s something you’d like. If not, I’m happy to provide private feedback via email.

Not sure where to start? Read about the project here.

LOCKING IN

Click, clack, clunk.

Each of the deadbolts were secured.

The drapes were drawn. The lights turned out.

I put on my noise-canceling headphones and sat at my desk. As powerful as the headphones were, I could still hear the soft pounding of the maggots at my door.

Nothing had gone to plan; somewhere along the line we’d screwed up big. The system we’d designed was collapsing around me. It was only a matter of time before it would consume itself. I couldn’t let that happen.

Even though I knew it was only a matter of time before they discovered me, it was still a shock once it finally happened.

I checked my watch. Fifteen minutes. It was going to be close.

I set the fuzes along the hallway. The bombs in the basement were on automatic timer, twenty minutes exactly.

This was the only way. The only way to set things right. Not self-destruction, not terrorism, not anarchy. What had I called it? Locking in.

A window broke upstairs. God, they were relentless.

I typed vigorously doing my best to reset the code before the whole building came crashing down on top of me.

The demons were close, now. On the same floor as me.

Ten minutes.

I wiped sweat away from my brow and kept typing.

The barrage of crashes and screams grew louder.

Five minutes.

It didn’t matter to me what my fate was. Not anymore. Because regardless of what the universe had in store for me, I had found the cheat codes to living. Yes, the demons would certainly return, and I’m sure a bunch of other unplanned surprises, too. But, the fact was I knew what elements were inevitable. I’d played games for decades before I started designing them. I knew the programming as well as the narratives.

That’s why I knew it was time for something different, a little more outside the box.

I watched as the seconds ticked away on my watch, counting down the inevitable.

Once those explosions went off, the entirety of my world would be transformed into a clean slate. Not completely devoid of the pre-existing criteria forced upon us gamers and designers, the parameters that we’ve taken for granted. All of those would still be there.

It simply wouldn’t matter any longer. Because they no longer applied to me. This was my game. And I was going to win on my terms.

The first of the explosions shook the building like an earthquake. The demons were clawing at the door, bursting through with their leathery talons.

As my surroundings disintegrated into a white void, I smiled. I’d learned so much from the shit that came before. Now, it was time to lock in, to do the work, distraction and self-infliction free.

I closed my eyes as the void consumed me, embracing the absolute nothingness. This was freedom.

For a while, I sat in that space. I could have remained there forever, truly, but I knew that there were others out there counting on me needing me and my work.

So, I took a deep breath, I opened my eyes…

…and I locked in again.